This has been an emotional day for me. As I have determined in my mind that the best place for me to serve God is in Knoxville's inner city, I have found myself grieving the loss of things I've yet to lose. I have examined my options and sought wise counsel. My conclusion is clear and my mind is at peace with this decision. My heart, on the other hand, is conflicted.
I had a wonderful $4 breakfast with Erica Pack at Webster's this morning, and I found myself overwhelmed with emotion...not for myself, but when I visualized the faces of the children who never hear anyone tell them, "I love you," "Your life has purpose," "You are fearfully and wonderfully made." No child should feel invisible. What could they do if they were given the tools to build their masterpieces? How can we, how can I equip them to change the world?
After meeting with Erica, I headed to Starbucks to meet with an old friend from college. This friend is dealing with the same sort of strugggle so many of us face...What does it mean to truly, authentically follow God? Intense conversation with a good listener and fellow learner.
Then to FBConcord to pick up the children from VBS. 2,000 kids...500+ volunteers...5 days...who knows how much time and money has been invested in this. I can't help but wonder what the return on investment is for this event. Is it worth it? One life changed forever? Twenty? Three hundred? How is value determined?
Reed and Rachel received some heart-breaking news last night. Today, they seem a little tentative, but curious, excited about some of the changes, and happy. I hope their parents continue to focus on their needs first.
Lots of folks to pray for and lots of pain around me. I am dealing with some very serious personal issues that I do not want to share here, but want to document for future reference. I know that God has a plan for me. How He will use my current situation for good, is something I cannot wait to see. Sometimes the pain is in proportion to the victory. This one should be good!